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Consider this a continuation of the last post, as I don’t feel like using the edit feature to add on to it.Which I guess, technically, doesn’t make it a marathon blog but… the spirit of the idea is still there and that’s all that matters. Right? Right. Let’s do it!
Quick hit about these Lipitor commercials, in which the creator of the Jarvik-7 artificial heart is on record supporting the medication Lipitor, a prescription used to lower cholesterol. Really? You’re gonna trust a guy who created a heart for you to use when your heart fails about cholesterol? I mean, the guy’s obviously a great doctor, and I’m sure the medication works. But that the more you see the commercial and think about what’s going on, it’s just laughable. I can’t even think of a proper simile to make a joke about it (i.e., “” was what I had in mind). It baffles me. Whatever, commercials don’t make sense these days.
Regarding the city where my sister was born: Apparently, someone tried to deposit a fake $1,000,000 bill in a bank in Aiken, South Carolina today or yesterday. It doesn’t even matter when it was. I don’t really care. This is just brilliant… In fact, I don’t even have to make a joke, because it just writes itself. People like this make being a smart ass blog writer easy.
Reporting on Bill Simmons’ “marathon chat” I talked about in the first post: Going off without a hitch so far, minus the issues with the font of the chatter’s questions being formatted as black font and clashing with the absolutely ridiculous background (which fades top-to-bottom from red to black. It’s a melting clock away from being something out of Van Gogh’s nightmares). Even posted a quick question about the Magic under my all-time favorite pseudonym “Danny Salamander” asking about the Orlando Magic’s success so far this season and the grossly overpaid Rashard Lewis (I would link to his salary, but it’s not public yet. It’s about $120 million over six years, which is more than I’ve got on me right now). The SG stated that he had changed his tune on the Magic since the preseason (”they’re really good”), but that still “doesn’t excuse them from overpaying Lewis by $50 million”. Agreed, Simmons, agreed.
Clayton’s Fantasy Football Update:
The “Coyne Moneymakers” are a dull 3-9, although we had a convincing 124-93 win this week over J.R. Rice’s “Steel Town”, thanks in part to the results of the Monday Night Football stinker in Pittsburgh. Final score? Zero-to-three, Steelers win, on a Jeff Reed field goal with 17 seconds left in the 4th quarter (as his team name suggests, J.R. had multiple Steelers slated for play on Monday night). You read correctly– I had to type the score out with words because it was bad of a game. Just an absolutely dismal and utterly boring outing by both teams. I feel sorry for anyone who suffered through all four quarters.
I’m still undecided on my long term Fantasy Football status. The team has gone wrongity wrong wrong wrongerson this year, but I believe this kind of bad luck may be unprecedented and I’ll need another season to judge Fantasy sports on the whole. So far, minus the 9 losses this season, it’s been a successful experiment. Good times.
More on Aiken, South Carolina criminal masterminds: My sister tells me that once someone robbed a bank with a pitchfork, was successful, went to Wendy’s for lunch afterwards (!?), and was promptly swarmed by officers before he could even sink into his classic double cheeseburger. Who does that? Imagine the cell phone call on the way to Wendy’s.
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